WHY I WROTE THIS BOOK

Why did I write this? Because I want you to breathe.

I’ve spent 19 years working with everyone from kids of incarcerated parents to high-net-worth professionals, and I realized something terrifying: we are all struggling with the same lies.

We think we aren’t “enough,” often feeling small in a world that demands we be big. We convince ourselves we are unworthy of one, a few, or all of the following: community, support, love, and happiness.

For some, this feels like being stranded on an island, isolated by the belief that no one understands. For others, it feels like carrying a silverback gorilla of trauma and expectations on our backs, crushing the joy out of us.

I wrote this book to help you get off that island and get that gorilla off your back.

We live on a beautiful planet with so much potential, yet we are stuck in a cycle where hurt people hurt people. I’m tired of seeing that pain passed down. I wrote this to give you permission to live your life, not the one you think you “should” live.

This book is my offering to help you heal your wounds, rediscover your worth, and finally experience the freedom and purpose you deserve.

WHAT’S THIS BOOK ABOUT?

Life Oversimplified is for anyone navigating the unrest and uncertainty of modern life, who feels stuck, burnt out, or quietly miserable while trying to do everything “they” say you should do.

You’ve been sold a lie: that there is one “secret recipe” for a happy life, and if you just follow the rules, you’ll be happy.

But if that were true, why do you still feel stuck?

Life Oversimplified destroys that myth.

This book isn’t about following someone else’s bland plan. It challenges the bullshit idea that a good life looks the same for everyone. Instead, this book hands you the apron. It’s about realizing that you are the chef.

We provide the essential ingredients, Purpose, Perspective, and Human Connection, and the permission to “chef up” your own unique recipe that actually tastes like freedom. You create the flavor.

This guide helps you identify the “shoulds,” “have-to’s,” and “supposed-to’s” weighing you down so you can take that heavy baggage and drop it off at the bus stop. This is a practical, raw, and honest guide to building a life that doesn’t just look good on a feed, but feels good in your soul.

WHAT’S INSIDE

You’re not getting a fluffy quote book or a rigid 10-step program. You’re getting a guided journey that looks like this:

Real stories, not theory

• From being adopted and molested as a child, to bartending and “flying by the seat of my pants,” to case-managing kids with incarcerated parents and working in Child Welfare, to becoming a therapist and college instructor. This book is built on lived experience, not ivory-tower theory.

Three core pillars: Purpose, Perspective, Human Connection

• What they really mean (beyond inspirational posters)
• How they show up in your everyday life: work, relationships, family, money, fun
• How to use them as a filter for decisions, boundaries, and the life you’re designing

Redefining Adulthood

• Why the textbook definition of “adult” is useless
• How to think about responsibility, free time, lifestyle, and impact in a way that actually matches your reality

Looking Back to Move Forward

• How your upbringing, trauma, and environment shaped you
• How to stop letting your past be the driver while still honoring what you’ve survived
• Practical ways to reassign meaning to challenging experiences so they become tools, not anchors

Where You Want to Go (Lifestyle + Impact)

• A grounded way to think about the kind of life you actually want (not just “be rich”)
• How to align your time, energy, and choices with the impact you want to have

The StaySmilinLife Map

• A simple framework to assess where you are, what matters most right now, and where to shift your effort so you’re not just grinding, you’re growing!

Exercises, prompts, and reflection questions

• Journaling and conversation prompts to help you connect the dots
• Small, doable experiments to try in real life (not just in your head)
• You’ll walk away with a clear, honest picture of your life, and a practical map for what to do next, helping you feel more confident and in control of your personal growth journey.

IS THIS BOOK FOR YOU?

BENEFITS OF READING THIS BOOK

By the end, you will:

• Stop outsourcing their happiness to other people’s expectations and start defining what “a good life” means for them.
• Understand how their past shaped them without letting it dictate who they are “allowed” to become.
• Use Purpose, Perspective, and Human Connection as daily tools, not abstract ideas.
• Build healthier relationships by learning how to be vulnerable, set boundaries, and connect beyond surface-level small talk.
• Shift from “life is happening to me” to “I’m co-creating my life,” even when things are unfair or hard.
• Treat themselves with more compassion while still holding themselves accountable.
• Create a flexible life map that helps them make decisions, catch themselves when they drift, and adjust as life changes.
• Feel less alone as they see their struggles reflected in real stories and feel more hopeful about what’s possible next.

MY HOPE FOR THIS BOOK

I hope that Life Oversimplified becomes your permission slip and a toolkit.

Permission for you to question the “rules” you were handed. Permission to admit you’re not okay, while still believing you’re worthy of a beautiful life. Permission for the dreamer in you to wake up and realize that yes, you actually do have what it takes. Permission to turn your pain into purpose, and your struggles into stories that connect you to others instead of isolating you.

I want this book to do more than sit on nightstands. I want it to show up in therapy rooms, college classrooms, book clubs, family living rooms, and late-night text threads. I want parents reading it with their teens, managers gifting it to their teams, and friends handing it to each other like, “Hey, I see you. Start here.”

Most of all, I hope it reminds you that you are already enough, right now, and that your smile, your story, and your growth matter more than you’ve been led to believe.

WHY I NEED  YOUR SUPPORT

If any part of you read this and thought, “Yep, that’s me!” I’m asking for your help to bring this book to life.

This crowdfunding campaign is how we:

• Fund the professional editing, design, and production the book deserves
• Get early copies into the hands of the people who need it most
• Prove to publishers, bookstores, and gatekeepers that everyday humans are hungry for this kind of honest, practical, heart-forward work

When you back this campaign, you’re not just pre-ordering a book. You’re:

• Saying yes to your own growth
• Helping someone else feel less alone in their struggle
• Joining a community of perfectly imperfect humans who are done pretending and ready to live on purpose

👉 Back the campaign today, own your smile, and help bring Life Oversimplified into the world.

“You’re not just buying a book, you’re investing in a world with more purpose, better perspectives, and deeper human connection, starting with you.”

You can pick the level that fits your budget and your impact goals, and together, we’ll bring Life Oversimplified to life.

PERKS AND PACKAGES MENU

MEET CARLOS

There’s not much I don’t really enjoy doing, and trying new things is just about my favorite thing to do in the world. I think of it like this: there was a time in my life that I had never tasted a one-day-old, cold corner piece of a brownie with a cold glass of milk. That mouthful of sweetness is just about my favorite treat, although since being vegan, I can’t seem to replicate the exact taste.

The way I see it, there’s gotta be something else I’ll love as much as that brownie out there, so I try everything. It goes the same with experiences, traveling, and connecting with people.

I have an MSW and am a Licensed Clinical Social Worker. I’ve been in and out of homes throughout San Diego since 2006, helping people with everything from navigating probation, parenting coaching, and guiding people through substance abuse recovery, to my time in Child Welfare Services, reunifying parents with their children.

What I’ve learned from 19 years of working with everyone from kids in the system to high-net-worth professionals is that there is a ton of untapped potential out there. Regardless of what part of the world I’ve been in (Ukraine, Spain, Mexico, Europe, Japan, South Korea, etc.), or how much money someone has (or doesn’t have), I have come to realize that everyone wants to be happy; it just looks a little different depending on who you are.

I currently serve as the Director of Youth Programs & Strategy at the Lucky Duck Foundation, and I teach Social Work courses at San Diego State University and Cuyamaca Community College, as well as a class I was fortunate to create for SDSU’s Honors College titled Purpose, Perspective, and Human Connection.

I also run my own private psychotherapy practice and spend my free time exercising, playing a variety of sports (mainly soccer and beach volleyball these days), working on cars, and giving back to the community.

While chasing my own purpose, I was fortunate to cross paths with a fantastic woman, Chelsea, who is now my wife. I now get to experience being a father to our son, Jackson Dean, and a father-figure to three other amazing kids. It is a non-stop experience of love and chaos, which I will most definitely have to write a book about later!

📚 Frequently Asked Questions